People That Make Me Laugh

So I am in a free poker league, I like to play cards. Last night was the first night at a new venue for myself and the location for this particular league and I wasn't sure what to expect...but I was in for a treat!

So as I stated in the first sentence, this poker league is FREE - so keep that in mind - but there are some fairly good prizes to those that can advance up from their location, namely travel expenses and buy-ins at WSOP and WPT events which are fairly respectable prizes. I would say the majority of the players there are playing just for fun. But of course there are the exceptions and they are the ones that give me a good chuckle...

So last night there was a group of 3 people - who knew each other - 1 male and 2 females. Each came equipped with their CD player and the male also made sure to have his sunglasses with as well. And note here, that they each brought a CD player, not an MP3 player, IPod or any other device that would fit in a person's pocket, but an actual circa 1995 portable CD Player...right there you know these folks are real 'players'. Once seeing this I made a challenge to myself that I would hope to outlast these three doorknobs.

So girl 1 spills her beer on herself and her chair before even 1 card is dealt. Girl 2 is eliminated before the blinds even increase even 1 level (20 minutes), so I'm thinking things are ending up about as I figured. Then time has come to merge tables and the male ends up sitting right next to me... I'm licking my chops and just hoping to get involved with a pot with this dolt but he goes all-in and loses to someone else...but he does not leave graciously. He grabs his coat from the back of his chair and storms off in obvious anger that he lost. I'm sure he is trying to figure out how he lost on a pair of 8's when the entire board was filled with over-cards? I find out later that he is a 'great' poker player and would take anyone to the cleaners if they so choose to, after finding this out me and some others are trying to get a game going with him.

But the best is girl 1. Yes, after she spills her beer and now is at least moderately intoxicated - we've been playing for an hour or so by now - is so in love with her cd player and music that she makes sure everyone at the table knows exactly what song she is listening too. Then after 1 song is complete she takes out the cd and inserts another to listen to one song and repeat. And to complete her profile, every song that 'she loved' (Oh, I love this song!) was from my high school days. AC/DC, Guns N Roses, Poison, Kiss - she had all the hits - and to top it off, she would ask if any of us like and/or have heard of any of these chart-top hits from just yesterday... another guy and myself started to mock her by saying "No, I have not heard of this band you call Warrant. Are they any good?" And she would then go on a lengthy explanation of how 'awesome' they are and sing the wrong lyrics to most of their popular songs... So then every hand the action comes to her and every hand we have to tell her to either bet, check or fold. And she would say "What? Oh, I'm sorry. How much?" How about you just stay home next week so you can rock out to some more Tesla and let us play cards? Then catastrophe strikes...her batteries in her vintage cd player have gone out and she needs to get more. She asks the table if we would wait for her while she ran to go get some from her car... it got quite a laugh. Oh please, let me go get the batteries for you and is there anything else I can do for you since you seem to think you are the only one that matters that is playing cards? Oh, but that's right, your a girl...even if your stupid, you still think just being a girl is a free pass to be annoying to everyone...

Oh, I succeeded in my challenge and outlasted all three of them... that in itself was a good prize for me!